Peices of my heart shattered, are like stars , they still twinkle in the night sky.

It's come to tears, heartache and barley breathing to realize.
It took months of pain, stress and anxiety to realize.
What was given to us so whole wholeheartedly by the creator was taken advantage of,
you see beauty everywhere but you never stop and take a second look.

this is what I've realized, my heart breaks, it is still a heart and it still functions like one and this is it's beauty. It took me a lot of time to stop crying, to stop asking why, but in the end all I really had to do was see the beauty in the situation.

It's hard to be happy, it takes effort, pain and self-reflection, it's easy to be sad, in times of adversity your comfort are your tears, they wrap around you like a pillow. a pillow of self-hate and regret and no answers but too many questions.

I once said to a friend, that it takes time for things to realize why? in your head. "You have to search though the deepest forests in the deepest darkest woods, and cut yourself on many sharp thorns to be able to pick the most beautiful rose'

now I think I finally understand why. I'm heartbroken, but this is a series of thoughts that would of inevitable come to me throughout my life, but I'm going to enjoy the heartache, i will grow and learn. I will not ask why, or why didn't this happen or why did this happen? I'm going to attribute to the beauty of the heartache.. in this too might be a pillar of hope, after all we ask god for happiness

, and he gives us the opportunity to be happy. It's not about asking for the answer it's about finding it.

Every adversity is an opportunity for change, this right now is an opportunity to express my pain, an through this adversity I'm writing this very sentence. In hope, perhaps it will be read by somebody else, and see things in a new perspective, all i know that if it had not been for heartache, I would not have been here.

I see people through a blind eye, i often see that they are just their souls, not people for their hair color, eye color or dress or representation, but souls and they produce their own image that i will then take into consideration but still see them as if looking through a blind mans eyes. I see souls, mine is broken but it is still a soul.

It will restore, replenish and perhaps be a better soul, so for this adversity I thank god. For this change I look for opportunity to change and better myself, I will not let this chance for change go, because it may be exactly what I need.

I will not cry.